mercy | catholic | 22 | im trying so hard
Once people stop believing in God, the problem is not that they will believe in nothing; rather, the problem is that they will believe anything.
― C.S. Lewis
“no matter how badly you think you’re doing it, someone else has done it a lot worse and been fine” is applicable to a wide, wide range of things and i say it to myself all the time
“bigger idiots than me have done it” is a phrase I live by
the intimacy of sharing old memories with someone new. check out the places i visited before i met you. i wish you were with me. maybe we can visit them together and create new memories? look at the pictures of the sky i took before we met. now you share the same view with my past self. look at the photos of my childhood and let me look at yours. have your facial features changed? your smile stayed the same, and i love it. look at my right cheek, i have the same birthmark as my grandmother. this is the child in me that you are healing with your affection. i am glad we met. all these years i was without you but now you know about all those years and even help me to grow. your love took roots in my past pain, and reaches out to my future happiness. please don’t stop smiling.
Draw badly. Write nonsensically. Embroider messily. Burn what you bake and cook. Get paint everywhere. Read half a book. Lose your mind for a bit. Plant things. Have faith in the process. Abandon 70 wood-carving projects. Get a kit and do some of it and never return to it. Get comfortable with sucking and losing motivation. Continue to create with reckless abandon.
“I feel very small. I don’t understand. I have so much courage, fire, energy, for many things, yet I get so hurt, so wounded by small things.”
Anaïs Nin, from nearer the moon: the previously unpublished unexpurgated diary,1937-1939
